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Day 4 of my Quit; Hello to all of you
Topic Started: Sep 3 2016, 05:12 PM (1,145 Views)
eyehatecope
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Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
Sorry to hear about your loss brother.

Use the fake stuff as long as it helps you stay off of the real stuff. Some people can throw it all away and I wish I had been one of those but, I wasn't. And I don't care for the simple fact that it helped me.

Anxiety. The lovely anxiety. I never experienced anxiety until I quit dipping. I made 3 trips in a week to the doctor with this. I had a gland swollen which in return didn't help matters. Of course I used google to diagnose myself and the rest should be easy to figure out. I was dying. I had convinced myself that I was literally dying. I'm done, I'm gone etc. On that 3rd trip to the doctor I was of course hiding from him this whole time that I had just quit what I thought was my best friend. Once I told him that he checked me out and gave me Xanax as well. I still have the bottle sitting on top of the fridge out of 30 pills I still have 21 in the bottle. I only used it if I really had to have it. And this was roughly around 50 days of my quit when this happened.

With that long post out of the way I just want to say good job and I'm proud to quit with you.

Eyehatecope
Jenny and Tom Kern

RIP My Brother!
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Rampant
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Nameless Ninja of QUIT!
[ *  *  * ]
Viking
Nov 5 2016, 07:30 AM
Rampant
Nov 5 2016, 05:52 AM
Man does time fly when you buckle down, do the best you can by your group and other brothers of quit. I sit here using some fake this morning because I am having some pretty bad anxiety still and cravings still come and go. I honestly think I could do without the fake but I just think it eases the oral fixation part every once and awhile. Ordered the 5 can sampler when i started my quit and still got 1 of them so 4 cans of fake over 67 days quit don't even know if that is considered a habit.

So lets jot down where we are in the QUIT, so I got me a bad ass group of Ninjas in Dec 'ninja2' and we are quit as fuck. I mean we rolling on two weeks straight of 100%, I am still 100% dedicated to my quit and I also try and do my best by new quitters if I find the time to do so.

However, I lost my Grandma this week and emotionally just a wreck over that because it was long and drug out, hospice care and bedside nights etc. But it is totally normal I think to feel that way going through an event such as that. However my damn body doesn't seem to know how to deal with my emotions. I got these crazy highs and lows and just weird thoughts. Can't even begin to tell you how many times I thought about just giving in during the last week just to make the pain go away. But that isn't real, giving in to nicotine isn't going to make any pain go away. It may mask some pain, but make it go away.. no chance. I got some closure on Wednesday at the funeral and finally laid my Grandma to rest she lived a long life to 89 and was ready to move on.

Next on the list is this damn anxiety, I was breaking into these massive panic attacks or anxiety attacks I have no idea what to really call them. What happens is my heart starts racing out of my chest, sweating, can't breath, scared as shit. Basically just an all around awful feeling and worrying that its going to strike you again. I have been dealing with this for about two weeks now I would say. Friday I finally broke down and went to the Dr. to talk things over and I am going to use some medication for some time to get through this, because running into the ER with these attacks is a joke. They lower your heart rate and blood pressure and send you home and you wait until it happens again.

What makes me the most said about all this anxiety is that I was probably having similar things go on for several years and was masking my emotions, feelings, thoughts with a fucking can of tobacco that was ruining my health even more. I have forgave myself for that and just looking to get things back in order. With my brothers and sisters of quit here at KTC I know I can make it through this, with the most sincerity I can possible say it with I am THANKFUL for each and every one of you guys and girls that have helped me along the way!! I just hope in some way I can pay it forward.

Rampant over and out!

PS: Fuck you Nic Rampant 67 QLMFer!
Rampant -

First let me start by saying I'm very sorry for your loss. What a terrible thing to have to go through any time, but even worse still in the heart of the quit. My condolences.

Congrats on staying quit. It is an inspiration for me that you can go through something so awful and life changing and come out on top of nictotine. For this, I will be forever grateful that you shared this post.

Finally, Here is one of my stories. Take it or leave it, but in case it helps.

I used to have very severe anxiety attacks like you are having and they suck. I had the Xanax and other things to help. The meds help, but they don't get rid of the problem. At least for me, after I got the balls to see a counselor for a few sessions, I found out that there was a bunch of shit in the past that was the root cause. I learned breathing techniques and they helped until I just stopped getting panic attacks. I think the cure for me was both facing the old demons and learning breathing techniques. I also used chew to combat anxiety.

Fast forward to today. I'm in day 6 of my quit. I've had 100xs the anxiety I've had in years in the last 6 days. The root cause is chew. Im leaning on you and others as my foundation, my counselors, etc to face the root cause of the anxiety and the domes. For me at least, posting all this shit gets rid of the anxiety or at least lessens it a ton.

Here's to hoping that just posting here in this blog helped your anxiety. Here's to learning breathing techniques. Here's to hoping you are ultimately able to determine the root cause of your anxiety, whether it is chew or something buried.

We're here for you and again very sorry for your loss
Thank you for letting me know that I am not alone in this panic/anxiety nightmare. I will not compound the problem by giving in to Nicotine. It at best was as you said nothing more than a bandaid covering up the root cause of these feeling and anxiety. I know I can conquer this and I look for to the next chapters of my life, I will not let this or anything else keep me down. I really appreciate you sharing your story and if you need anything don't hesitate to ask my digits are a PM away. We are stronger together than we are apart!
“If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.”
"Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them."
rampninja
“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”
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My Quit Group: Click Here The Best Spreadsheet: Click Here
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Rampant
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Nameless Ninja of QUIT!
[ *  *  * ]
eyehatecope
Nov 5 2016, 08:05 AM
Sorry to hear about your loss brother.

Use the fake stuff as long as it helps you stay off of the real stuff. Some people can throw it all away and I wish I had been one of those but, I wasn't. And I don't care for the simple fact that it helped me.

Anxiety. The lovely anxiety. I never experienced anxiety until I quit dipping. I made 3 trips in a week to the doctor with this. I had a gland swollen which in return didn't help matters. Of course I used google to diagnose myself and the rest should be easy to figure out. I was dying. I had convinced myself that I was literally dying. I'm done, I'm gone etc. On that 3rd trip to the doctor I was of course hiding from him this whole time that I had just quit what I thought was my best friend. Once I told him that he checked me out and gave me Xanax as well. I still have the bottle sitting on top of the fridge out of 30 pills I still have 21 in the bottle. I only used it if I really had to have it. And this was roughly around 50 days of my quit when this happened.

With that long post out of the way I just want to say good job and I'm proud to quit with you.

Eyehatecope
Yes they also recommend me something similar Xanax or other drugs like it. However I didn't want to use such drugs because one can become addicted to those as well and they are pretty powerful themselves. I am just using a drug classified as a Anti-depressant and it has been used for years to help people quit smoking and deal with the anxiety. I HATE the fact of using medication, and I can't stand going to the doctor but I just needed something to take the edge off this horrible anxiety so I could function normally until I find a more permanent fix.

Thank you for your support glad to be quit with you!!
“If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.”
"Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them."
rampninja
“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”
Live Chat
My Quit Group: Click Here The Best Spreadsheet: Click Here
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ChickDip
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a.k.a. LBP
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
You've been through it, and still quit.
I am proud to quit with you.
Congrats on your 100 days!
"The load doesn't weigh me down at all... he ain't heavy, he's my brother"

"Try to believe that you are worth more than you think, and others are worth more than you think."

"If you haven't... Quit now......If you have... Stay that way " ~AppleJack ----------- "I am quit... for today... with you... but not FOR you" ~LBP

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tjschu
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Quit Master
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ChickDip
Dec 8 2016, 03:51 AM
You've been through it, and still quit.
I am proud to quit with you.
Congrats on your 100 days!
Congrats on reaching HOF!
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pab1964
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Proud member of 2015 April Silverbacks!
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tjschu
Dec 8 2016, 07:27 AM
ChickDip
Dec 8 2016, 03:51 AM
You've been through it, and still quit.
I am proud to quit with you.
Congrats on your 100 days!
Congrats on reaching HOF!
Congratulations you hofer! Damn proud of you!
ROLL TIDE ROLL! God, Family and crappie fishing! I will always be an addict, but hopefully never a slave again!
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