Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
KillTheCan.org | Blog | Twitter | Facebook | Store | LIVE CHAT
Welcome to KillTheCan.org Online Community. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Dirty Little Secret; Introduction
Topic Started: May 8 2014, 08:31 PM (1,498 Views)
derv88
Member Avatar
Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
Welp, here goes my introduction.

I smoked cigarettes for about 16 years after shunning people around me for most of my youth who smoked. You know, the college thing - everyone's doing it. But not everyone did it for that long.

Then I stopped and started dipping. Sure, I was proud of myself for quitting smoking, bragged about it to everyone I could, but I had a secret. A Dirty Little Secret.

The Nic Bitch had me by the balls, transfering my addiction from my lungs to my mouth. I shamefully dipped for the next 6 years and more or less hid it from everyone except those closest to me. I work in a suit-and-tie type job and hid my addiction from the world. After my work day was over and the last meeting concluded, I returned home or to my hotel room and tortured myself and my body with this evil concoction. Punnishment for the things that went wrong that day. Punnishment for my great or poor job performance. Punnishment for my "winding down" from stress and anxiety.

My wife made it more and more apparent to me that I was a slave to the Bitch. She had seen enough. Reaching for the tin while on vacation in Spain. Reaching for the tin while enjoying a sunset on the beach. Reaching for the tin while doing anything and everything. Scrambling to find 7-Elevens open and nearby.

Then one day, I quit. I can't believe I pulled the trigger, cold turkey baby. That was a month ago, which seems like a year ago - and then tomorrow it will seem like yesterday. I look forward to ending my 22 year relationship with the Bitch. That's half of my damn life. How did that happen?

I know this is now my reality. I have embraced my new reality. I like the new me with one less crutch. I want to be free and I will do everything to maintain that freedom, and earn more of it.

Thank you for your (future) support, because I am sure gonna need it, hopefully I can provide equal support to those who need it.

derv
aka derv88
aka Jack
Edited by derv88, May 8 2014, 08:33 PM.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Steakbomb18
Member Avatar
Grade A Badass
[ *  *  *  * ]
Interesting. You quit a month ago, joined the site 3 weeks ago, and just posted your intro now. You also have 6 posts…so, have you been posting roll? Interesting in deed.

None-the-less, you say you are quit and have not used nicotine since April 10th. If that is the case, then congratulations. That is no small accomplishment by any means. In order to keep your ball moving in the right direction I think it would be best if you start posting roll with the July quit group and build an accountability network to strengthen your quit. Get involved, stay active. Stop hiding in the shadows and be proud to be quit.
HOF: 3/21/2014
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
grizzlyhasclaws
Member Avatar
The Elusive Sasquatch
[ *  *  *  * ]
Get in here and post roll every damn day with your quit group. That's how we do it here.
'FU' Proud FFFoQer - February 2014 'FU'

'FU' Free from dog shit! 'FU'

ODAAT & NAFAR
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
scoot66
Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
Good evening derv.....i been quit of the shit 17 days now and I quit with you today. And I will see you at roll and quit with you tommorow. PM me any time for #'s or anything you need. See you tommorow.....Scoot66.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Reeseb
Newbie
[ * ]
Good to hear from you. Let's see what you're made of.

Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Doc Chewfree
Member Avatar
Quit Wizard
[ *  *  *  * ]
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
Quit on Feb. 6, 2014

Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
mb289
Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
SirDerek
Member Avatar
Knight of Quit
[ *  *  *  * ]
mb289
May 11 2014, 06:58 AM
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Listen to these 2, and think about this equation:

Accountability + Brotherhood = Success.

it works, you just have to apply it into your life.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Doc Chewfree
Member Avatar
Quit Wizard
[ *  *  *  * ]
SirDerek
May 12 2014, 01:04 PM
mb289
May 11 2014, 06:58 AM
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Listen to these 2, and think about this equation:

Accountability + Brotherhood = Success.

it works, you just have to apply it into your life.
Four days in a row on roll. That's a good start. Keep posting and you'll keep quitting. Before you know it you'll have that F pulled up to a C.
Quit on!
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
Quit on Feb. 6, 2014

Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
derv88
Member Avatar
Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
Doc Chewfree
May 12 2014, 02:40 PM
SirDerek
May 12 2014, 01:04 PM
mb289
May 11 2014, 06:58 AM
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Listen to these 2, and think about this equation:

Accountability + Brotherhood = Success.

it works, you just have to apply it into your life.
Four days in a row on roll. That's a good start. Keep posting and you'll keep quitting. Before you know it you'll have that F pulled up to a C.
Quit on!
Thank you for recognizing. I am quit and am accountable for roll. I am doing this, and getting involved. Been texting couple of times with my brother scoot when in need. It works.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
SirDerek
Member Avatar
Knight of Quit
[ *  *  *  * ]
derv88
May 12 2014, 09:49 PM
Doc Chewfree
May 12 2014, 02:40 PM
SirDerek
May 12 2014, 01:04 PM
mb289
May 11 2014, 06:58 AM
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Listen to these 2, and think about this equation:

Accountability + Brotherhood = Success.

it works, you just have to apply it into your life.
Four days in a row on roll. That's a good start. Keep posting and you'll keep quitting. Before you know it you'll have that F pulled up to a C.
Quit on!
Thank you for recognizing. I am quit and am accountable for roll. I am doing this, and getting involved. Been texting couple of times with my brother scoot when in need. It works.
well done,

tip - shoot your brother scoot a text even when you don't need. just shoot the sh*t with him.....and get a few more....

but way to go taking those steps.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
Doc Chewfree
Member Avatar
Quit Wizard
[ *  *  *  * ]
SirDerek
May 12 2014, 09:54 PM
derv88
May 12 2014, 09:49 PM
Doc Chewfree
May 12 2014, 02:40 PM
SirDerek
May 12 2014, 01:04 PM
mb289
May 11 2014, 06:58 AM
Doc Chewfree
May 10 2014, 11:07 PM
Derv, you've gotta get consistent on posting roll. It is the only way to succeed and you have a shitty post average. Post up and I will quit with you.
Welcome Derv! Looks like you are on the right path. But, like stated above, post roll and get involved. It really does help!

mb289
Listen to these 2, and think about this equation:

Accountability + Brotherhood = Success.

it works, you just have to apply it into your life.
Four days in a row on roll. That's a good start. Keep posting and you'll keep quitting. Before you know it you'll have that F pulled up to a C.
Quit on!
Thank you for recognizing. I am quit and am accountable for roll. I am doing this, and getting involved. Been texting couple of times with my brother scoot when in need. It works.
well done,

tip - shoot your brother scoot a text even when you don't need. just shoot the sh*t with him.....and get a few more....

but way to go taking those steps.
Now your quitting hard!
Keep it up. PM me if you need anything.
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
Quit on Feb. 6, 2014

Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
derv88
Member Avatar
Quit Ninja
[ *  *  * ]
So here's what has happened last night...just when I thought I was cruising...night sweats, tossing and turning, weirdly vivid dreams, massive nerve tingling on side of mouth almost feels post dentist novicane shot, stomach issues..Doesn't help some dumb shit was smoking in the hotel stairwell and I can smell that shit coming in from under my door each time I toss and turn. It makes me sick to my stomach literally.

Woke up this am and went to first meeting at 8am. Wanted to tell everyone in meeting to fuck off. Then it dawned on me when thinking about my mood today and what happened last night...the fog had returned!

Once I came to that realization, it lifted almost immediately.

Holy hell this is going to be a full-on war possibly for the rest of my life. What a stupid decision to marry the nic bitch in the first place. Rage toward the nic manufacturers.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
grizzlyhasclaws
Member Avatar
The Elusive Sasquatch
[ *  *  *  * ]
derv88
May 13 2014, 11:38 AM
So here's what has happened last night...just when I thought I was cruising...night sweats, tossing and turning, weirdly vivid dreams, massive nerve tingling on side of mouth almost feels post dentist novicane shot, stomach issues..Doesn't help some dumb shit was smoking in the hotel stairwell and I can smell that shit coming in from under my door each time I toss and turn. It makes me sick to my stomach literally.

Woke up this am and went to first meeting at 8am. Wanted to tell everyone in meeting to fuck off. Then it dawned on me when thinking about my mood today and what happened last night...the fog had returned!

Once I came to that realization, it lifted almost immediately.

Holy hell this is going to be a full-on war possibly for the rest of my life. What a stupid decision to marry the nic bitch in the first place. Rage toward the nic manufacturers.
It'll get better bro. I guarantee it. Keep fighting and keep it simple. ODAAT.
'FU' Proud FFFoQer - February 2014 'FU'

'FU' Free from dog shit! 'FU'

ODAAT & NAFAR
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
LeonardThompson
Quitter
[ *  * ]
Listen to Griz...He's smarter than the average bear, and he might not snatch your pic-a-nick basket.

I'm around Day 79 and I know what you're feeling. You're bored with your quit. You're feeling like you're probably not going to cave, but sometimes everything just sucks.

I felt like this around day 50. It's been getting better. It will for you, and for all of us. A little trick that I can play now, is when I am having a bad time, I just visualize going to a convenience store, purchasing dip, opening it up, and stuffing a wad in my face. I visualize every step of the process, and then I imagine how I would feel once I had that dip in.

I would feel like the absolute, stupidest motherfucker going. It works.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
Go to Next Page
« Previous Topic · Introductions · Next Topic »
Add Reply