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First post; My story
Topic Started: Feb 28 2014, 06:16 PM (8,438 Views)
Done4Me
Member Avatar
Go Pack!
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
I'm with you, that would be a kick in the nuts. I imagine you were looking for a wry smile and proud of you son retort. I'm sure you still had a good day but I'll bet his comment changed your mood the rest of the fishing trip. You still had a chance to spend time with him on father's day. And as hard as it'll be for you, it has to be his decision. You can prompt him with a support offer, " Dad if you decide to quit again I'll support you 100%" but after that it's up to him.
Quit Date: May 5, 2014
HOF Speech
August 2014 Triple A Brass Ballers
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Smeds
Member Avatar
Burnt Boat
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
HOF Speech

The Bluebird can sing, but the Crow's got the soul.

Don't get confused between my personality & my attitude. My personality is who I am, my attitude depends on who you are ...

HOF --- 07/21/2014
2nd Floor --- 10/29/2014
3rd Floor --- 02/06/2015
One YEAR! -- 04/13/2015
4th Floor --- 05/17/2015
5th Floor --- 08/25/2015
6th Floor --- 12/03/2015
7th Floor --- 03/12/2016
TWO YEARS --- 04/13/2016
8th Floor --- 06/20/2016
9th Floor --- 09/28/2016
Monster Quit Dick, aka: 1,000 --- 01/06/2017
THREE YEARS --- 04/13/2017
11th Floor --- 04/16/2017
12th Floor --- 03/19/2017
13th Floor --- 11/02/2017
14th Floor --- 02/10/2018
15th Floor ... 05/21/2018
July 2014 DD's

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J2thaZ
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Karate Chopping the NB today, Hiiiiiii-YAH!
[ *  * ]
Smeds
Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
Desire. Dedication. Discipline.

"You determine if you are going to make it, not your excuses." - flashman

"those who are truly my brothers know that I will never betray them." - LOOT

"ain't no way I'm going to lie to my Sultans....I'd rather die" - CavMan83
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brettlees
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Quit Wizard
[ *  *  *  * ]
J2thaZ
Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
Smeds
Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Took my freedom back October 23, 2013.

Here's an article that taught me a lot and made me hate the addiction: Nicotine Addiction 101-- newer quitters check it out-- and vets do it too, to breathe new life into your quit!

24 Quitters I have met: Ihatecope, >Pinched<, T-Cell, grizzlyhasclaws, Canvasback, BaseballPlayer, Cbird65, ERDVM, BradleyGuy, Ted, Zeno, AppleJack, Bronc, Knockout, MookieBlaylock, Rdad, 2mch2lv4, MN_Ben, Natro, Lippizaner, Amquash, ChristopherJ, GDubya, Mogul. Each one was a real honor and continues to fortify my resolve to stay QUIT!
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rdad
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Attention all planets of the solar federation......... I have assumed control.....
[ *  *  *  * ]
brettlees
Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
J2thaZ
Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
Smeds
Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
ODAAT....Learn It.....Know It.....Live It
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Krusty

[ *  *  * ]
rdad
Jun 16 2014, 12:01 PM
brettlees
Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
J2thaZ
Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
Smeds
Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
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loot

Krusty
Jun 16 2014, 07:26 PM
rdad
Jun 16 2014, 12:01 PM
brettlees
Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
J2thaZ
Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
Smeds
Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
Doc...If it's any consulation...I'll tell you your dad is wrong. The craves do go away. For me...The last thing I can attribute to nicotine cessation was at day 700 or so. I just hit 3300. You do the math. That's a long time living life on my terms. I don't notice it. I don't want it. I don't see others doing it. It's not something I long for. It really doesn't enter my mind other than when I'm here....and even then, it has no power.

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slinger
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Jun 16 2014, 08:09 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 07:26 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 12:01 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
Doc...If it's any consulation...I'll tell you your dad is wrong. The craves do go away. For me...The last thing I can attribute to nicotine cessation was at day 700 or so. I just hit 3300. You do the math. That's a long time living life on my terms. I don't notice it. I don't want it. I don't see others doing it. It's not something I long for. It really doesn't enter my mind other than when I'm here....and even then, it has no power.

That's quite a story, Doc. Thanks for sharing. I can understand why you're so tore up over this. Your old man sounds a lot like mine. He chewed for years. The entire time I was growing up, he always had a big chew in. Then, one day he just decided he was done. That was it. I never saw him chew again. Fortunately, he never took it back up again. I think someone already said it, but even when it's your own father, they have to want to quit for them. Just keep doing what you're doing and maybe he will catch some inspiration from watching you. Quit on, Brother.
We are what we repeatedly do. ~ Aristotle

Quit or get off the pot, Sally. ~ Diesel2112

The way I see it, you can either post roll daily or fuck off. ~ jost2brown

Bam! Right in the ass! ~ MonsterEMT

Quit Date: 3/4/14
HOF Date: 6/11/14
2nd Floor: 9/19/14
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grizzlyhasclaws
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Jun 16 2014, 08:56 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 08:09 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 07:26 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 12:01 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
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Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
Doc...If it's any consulation...I'll tell you your dad is wrong. The craves do go away. For me...The last thing I can attribute to nicotine cessation was at day 700 or so. I just hit 3300. You do the math. That's a long time living life on my terms. I don't notice it. I don't want it. I don't see others doing it. It's not something I long for. It really doesn't enter my mind other than when I'm here....and even then, it has no power.

That's quite a story, Doc. Thanks for sharing. I can understand why you're so tore up over this. Your old man sounds a lot like mine. He chewed for years. The entire time I was growing up, he always had a big chew in. Then, one day he just decided he was done. That was it. I never saw him chew again. Fortunately, he never took it back up again. I think someone already said it, but even when it's your own father, they have to want to quit for them. Just keep doing what you're doing and maybe he will catch some inspiration from watching you. Quit on, Brother.
My parents have both smoked for like 46 years each, since they were 16. They both chew Nicorette gum when they can't smoke. It's just sad to watch.
'FU' Proud FFFoQer - February 2014 'FU'

'FU' Free from dog shit! 'FU'

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Diesel2112
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Jun 16 2014, 09:09 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 08:09 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 07:26 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 12:01 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
Doc...If it's any consulation...I'll tell you your dad is wrong. The craves do go away. For me...The last thing I can attribute to nicotine cessation was at day 700 or so. I just hit 3300. You do the math. That's a long time living life on my terms. I don't notice it. I don't want it. I don't see others doing it. It's not something I long for. It really doesn't enter my mind other than when I'm here....and even then, it has no power.

That's quite a story, Doc. Thanks for sharing. I can understand why you're so tore up over this. Your old man sounds a lot like mine. He chewed for years. The entire time I was growing up, he always had a big chew in. Then, one day he just decided he was done. That was it. I never saw him chew again. Fortunately, he never took it back up again. I think someone already said it, but even when it's your own father, they have to want to quit for them. Just keep doing what you're doing and maybe he will catch some inspiration from watching you. Quit on, Brother.
My parents have both smoked for like 46 years each, since they were 16. They both chew Nicorette gum when they can't smoke. It's just sad to watch.
Interesting stuff. I have a few friends who dabble in nicotine. A cigar here, a chew during a round of golf, maybe a cig at the bar...but then that's it. They shut it down. They can go the rest of the week, or month, or more with nothing. My Dad smokes a variety of cigars but will sometimes go months in between.

It kind of gets to me at times and even now I sometimes wonder if I could do the same. You know, handle "just one". But I already know the answer... I cannot and I proved it many times over. Why else did I end up here? I was up to almost 2 cans of Kodiak a day. I said countless times I was going to cut back, or only do it at bowling, or while golfing, or on long drives, or on the weekends, etc...It never happened. I did it all those occasions, and more. I once spit chew juice on my crank while I took a shit. You think I had a problem????

Eventually I learned to just forget about everyone else and worry about ME. My buddy can have a cigar now and again...good for him. I know that I cannot. What HE does should not affect ME in any way, shape, or form.

I recognized I had a problem, I came here to quit, and that's what I'm going to do.

I gave up dipping, not breathing. There's a million other things I can spend my time doing other than dipping. What others choose to do is of no consequence to me. Even if that person is my Dad.

Just my 2 cents...

Quit on...
Quit 06/04/12
HOF 9/11/12
2nd floor 12/20/12
3rd floor 03/30/13
4th floor 07/08/13
5th floor 10/16/13
6th floor 01/24/14
7th floor 05/04/14
8th floor 08/12/14
9th floor 10/20/14
Comma 02/28/15
11th floor 06/08/15
12th floor 09/16/15
13th floor 12/25/15
14th floor 04/03/16
15th floor 7/11/16
16th floor 10/20/16
17th floor 01/27/17
18th floor 05/08/17
19th floor 08/14/17
20th floor 11/27/17
21st floor 03/11/18

"Celebrate the moment as it turns into one more"..
"You can fight without ever winning, but never ever win, win without a fight".
"Onion rings...funyons. A connection? Yeah. I fucking think so."
"Honest Abe had a fake jaw".
"In a world that seems so small, I can't stop thinking big"
"Someone set a bad example. Made surrender seem all right
The act of a noble warrior. Who lost the will to fight."

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Jun 16 2014, 10:30 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 07:26 PM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:26 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 10:00 AM
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Jun 16 2014, 08:13 AM
Doc Chewfree
Jun 15 2014, 11:26 PM
Just got back from spending the day fishing with my Dad. He's 80 years old, still works delivering mail 6 hours a day and very young for his age. Had a really nice day with him and caught quite a few fish.
My old man has always been a nicotine dabbler. When I was a kid I remember him smoking a pipe for a while and he quit it cold turkey. Then he smoked cigars for a while and quit them cold turkey. After I got out of high school, he began to chew leaf tobacco. He did that for around 15 years and then told me one day that he quit....cold turkey of course about 10-12 years ago. Said that he didn't like the hold it was getting on him. He's always had what seemed to me to be an insane amount of self-control. Something that I did not inherit from him. If he needed to lose weight, he quit eating breakfast. If he wanted to quit chewing, he just did. Meanwhile, I just kept chewing. He did say to me a few years after he quit that it was a lot harder to quit than anything else and he still thought about it a lot.
In 1999 he was diagnosed with a fairly advanced and aggressive form of bladder cancer. Long story short, after a scary year or two, having his urinary bladder removed and a new one made from his bowel, fast forward 15 years and he is cancer free. He just got back from his yearly visit and still a clean bill of health.
As I got in the boat with him today, I stuffed a fist full of seeds in my mouth and told him that I had finally quit chewing...130 days ago. He kind of nonchalantly said, "Oh yeah? I just started chewing again." It was like someone kicked me in the gut. I'm still kind of sick about it. He went on to say that the surgeon that did his bladder surgery said that there is a really great chance that he will never have cancer again. And, that he just has a chew every once in a while. Does that sound like addict logic or what. Now, if anyone can just occasionally have a chew, it is my dad, but I doubt it. He mentioned that the cravings never went away.
Surely, he realized that the doctor said that in regards to the cancer he removed...not in general. I don't know what to think. He's 80 and lived through a horrible ordeal with cancer. He never said anything about me chewing. I'm not sure that I wouldn't do the same thing he is if I had gone through what he did. I wouldn't now, knowing what I have learned in the last 130 days.
I'm all fucked up about this. I don't know what to think or say about it. I'm mad, disappointed, shocked...but at the same time...it's his decision. I think it is so hard for me to hear because of what I know about the addiction. I hate that the bitch is winning with Dad. I hate that, like him, we will always have this fucking addiction to deal with.
I know this is just rambling but it really fucked up my thoughts.
Regardless...I QLF...just wish my old man still was.
Thanks for sharing Doc, tough call for sure. Be thankful for the great day of fishing ... and realize you can't make him quit. You can, however let him know you love him and don't want to lose him to an insidious disease that almost took him out In the past. After that? It's on him. I support you brother, and am sorry for the shit feelings this has brought about. Don't let it affect your quit, stay strong!
Sorry to hear about this Doc. My pops smokes about a pack and a day and my family has tried to intervene with him on a couple of occasions to get him to quit with zero success. It actually almost led to him and my mom splitting up and he couldn't understand why it was such a big deal to everybody else. He'd always say it doesn't affect us it only affects him. That's b.s. on a number of levels but I'll save that for a different post. I think the message is that no matter how much you love somebody, you can't quit for them. This is a bitch of a disease and not everybody wants to put that time/effort into freedom from it. Thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad that with grace he's able to pull himself away yet again.

J2thaZ
This sounds really rough to digest Doc. Glad you are here with us at least. Thanks for the perspective. Damned stuff has millions of minds twisted.
Doc, thanks for sharing that. It hurts to see our loved ones doing things they shouldn't. We know better than anyone that nothing happens in our lives till WE are READY for the change. You just have to take care of yourself and revel in the fact that you are succeeding at one of the toughest things there is to do. Very few have the strength and conviction to do what you are doing. Keep going brother. You have a lot of support here!
Thanks for sharing, Doc, and I'm really sorry to hear of the mental tug-of-war you're fighting. You know your dad and your relationship with him better than any of us, and are in the best position to say something if it doesn't jeopardize your relationship, or let a sleeping dog lie if it does -- noting that there are obviously a lot of options in between the two scenarios to let him know you're busted up about it. You may not be able to get him to physically stop doing it -- or even want to stop -- but that doesn't mean you can't let him know that you want him to stop. Would've, could've, and should've is a terrible game to play. One guy's thoughts -- I'm going through something similar with my younger brother, who I'm all but certain started dipping way back when once he saw me doing it, thus instantly validating the nasty shit. Good luck and, if nothing else, let this further strengthen your resolve.
Doc...If it's any consulation...I'll tell you your dad is wrong. The craves do go away. For me...The last thing I can attribute to nicotine cessation was at day 700 or so. I just hit 3300. You do the math. That's a long time living life on my terms. I don't notice it. I don't want it. I don't see others doing it. It's not something I long for. It really doesn't enter my mind other than when I'm here....and even then, it has no power.

That's quite a story, Doc. Thanks for sharing. I can understand why you're so tore up over this. Your old man sounds a lot like mine. He chewed for years. The entire time I was growing up, he always had a big chew in. Then, one day he just decided he was done. That was it. I never saw him chew again. Fortunately, he never took it back up again. I think someone already said it, but even when it's your own father, they have to want to quit for them. Just keep doing what you're doing and maybe he will catch some inspiration from watching you. Quit on, Brother.
My parents have both smoked for like 46 years each, since they were 16. They both chew Nicorette gum when they can't smoke. It's just sad to watch.
Interesting stuff. I have a few friends who dabble in nicotine. A cigar here, a chew during a round of golf, maybe a cig at the bar...but then that's it. They shut it down. They can go the rest of the week, or month, or more with nothing. My Dad smokes a variety of cigars but will sometimes go months in between.

It kind of gets to me at times and even now I sometimes wonder if I could do the same. You know, handle "just one". But I already know the answer... I cannot and I proved it many times over. Why else did I end up here? I was up to almost 2 cans of Kodiak a day. I said countless times I was going to cut back, or only do it at bowling, or while golfing, or on long drives, or on the weekends, etc...It never happened. I did it all those occasions, and more. I once spit chew juice on my crank while I took a shit. You think I had a problem????

Eventually I learned to just forget about everyone else and worry about ME. My buddy can have a cigar now and again...good for him. I know that I cannot. What HE does should not affect ME in any way, shape, or form.

I recognized I had a problem, I came here to quit, and that's what I'm going to do.

I gave up dipping, not breathing. There's a million other things I can spend my time doing other than dipping. What others choose to do is of no consequence to me. Even if that person is my Dad.

Just my 2 cents...

Quit on...
Thanks for all of the support. It really helps me to just get it out there. Will probably talk to him about it at some point.
Thanks, brothers.
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
Quit on Feb. 6, 2014

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Doc...just thought I would jog through here...just for you buddy!
"If you want to quit then stop talking and just QUIT. If you want to kill yourself a bullet is cheaper and faster than a tin, plus it eliminates my hearing you whine and cry like a bitch."

Best thing I have read on KTC...Submitted by tgafish on 7/3/14

Former Skoal Straight and Cope Longcut user that started at the age of 12. QUIT on 7/15/13
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kdip
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NO PINCH for me Walt! I Don't USE that SHIT anymore!
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Jul 3 2014, 09:06 AM
Doc...just thought I would jog through here...just for you buddy!
Have a great nic-free weekend Doc!
Quit Date 09/02/08

HOF Date 12/11/08

1,000 Days 5/30/11

Copenhagen WAS my Bitch! May she rest in peace!!!

December '08 Bouncers Kick Ass!!!
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Doc Chewfree
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Jul 3 2014, 11:00 AM
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Jul 3 2014, 09:06 AM
Doc...just thought I would jog through here...just for you buddy!
Have a great nic-free weekend Doc!
You have no idea how much I missed her.
Thanks!
You too Kdip.
Edited by Doc Chewfree, Jul 5 2014, 07:22 PM.
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
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Doc Chewfree
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Thought I'd dust off the old intro page tonight. Just got back from my first family vacation without that two-bit whore nicotine tagging along. Had a great time on the beach with the wife and kids. Spent somewhere around 26 hours in a car. Hired a guide and caught some awesome fish. All in all...a great time.
I've had a lot of firsts in the last 186 days. Until now, I had never even been an adult without nicotine.
It feels good.
I'm still using some fake and seeds. Not really worried about that but I don't like the way I look carrying that round can in my pocket.
When I see someone using nicotine now, I feel pity for them. I have disdain for them. How stupid are people? How can it be legal to even sell that shit?!?
The last night in Florida, my son and I were hanging out on the sound shore while the wife and daughter went to the gulf beach. They are like 400 yards apart. He was making a sand town and I was "fishing". Then this guy walked by with this horse dick cigar. We exchanged greetings and he continued his stroll down the beach. I could smell that nasty trash fire for over 10minutes. It also announced his return by about 10 minutes. I have never liked the smell of cigarette or cigar smoke, but this was exceptionally foul. What was different was my perception of this guy. Normally I would have thought, "what a poser" or something along those lines. This time I thought, "how sad." This guy thinks he's having a special moment on the beach with his cigar when all he is doing is finding some way to justify ignoring his family while he sucks a giant nasty dick of nicotine. Then he will go back to his wife and maybe kids and smell like he has licked ashes off of a homeless person's taint.
On the trip home, I saw a guy flirting with a chick and he had a can of chew in his pocket. I thought, "man, if that young shit had a clue, he would not think that chewing that shit was cool."
That's when I realized I had a can of fake in my pocket and someone could be thinking that about me.
What the fuck do I care what they think? I'm quit and this little can of herbal shit helps keep me that way. I'd rather look a fool the rest of my days than actually be that fool for another minute.
Anyway, back to the grind in the morning, but a great week with my family...quit.
Edited by Doc Chewfree, Aug 10 2014, 10:52 PM.
Brave men are honored, rich men are envied, powerful men are feared, but only a man with character is trusted
Quit on Feb. 6, 2014

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